Is this healthy?


hayley smilingI love my wife. Seriously. She’s awesome.

But I like making her mad.

Not raging, out-of-control, throwing-cell-phones mad. Just irritated, my-arm-slapping mad.

I blame it on the fact that I am an only child and never had the opportunity to mess with any siblings. But who knows why I take such enjoyment from seeing Hayley’s face scrunch up in annoyance.

Fortunately for me (not for Hayley), I’m fairly adept at triggering a response. After only eight years together (counting our courtship), I’ve figured out what to say and how to say it to get the reaction I’m looking for. It’s frightening to think what emotional terror I’ll be able to cause after 20.

Is this normal? Do other people out there take pleasure in frustrating their spouse?

Please let me know I’m not a bad husband.

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  1. Missy
    September 12, 2008 at 2:18 pm — Reply

    Hi Todd. I think you are just a typical man, and I don’t mean that as a bad thing. My husband ADORES making me crazy, and messes with my mind all the time. He will call me with some way off beat story, like ‘ you;re not gonna believe it but it’s actually raining frogs in the back yard” or something, and I say “really???” and he says “no, not really” and he gets me every single time!! Men who know their wives well know what buttons to push to get the desired reaction, like you said, and for some reason, some men enjoy making the loves of their lives pull out their hair, stomp around the house screaming or just give them “the look”! And all for giggles. lol It is harmless fun and no, you are not a bad husband.

  2. eagledesigner
    September 12, 2008 at 2:39 pm — Reply

    hmm…I’m thinking you might need another hobby and focus

  3. Kay Pasta
    September 12, 2008 at 4:10 pm — Reply

    Practice makes purrrfect!!!

  4. September 12, 2008 at 4:30 pm — Reply

    The important part of the marriage equation to remind a spouse of is this;

    Torment is not equal to torture – Don’t be cruel in your kindness, my friend.

    Your wife is lovely.

    You are a bwaggart, nodda bully.


  5. Sam's Dad
    September 12, 2008 at 4:59 pm — Reply

    Now THAT’S spiritual leadership.

  6. September 12, 2008 at 6:08 pm — Reply

    My dear hubby man of 28 years wants me to share the following with you;

    Him to me, tee-hee…

    “I used to take great pleasure in tormenting you until I realized you were actually crazy, really….”

    He made me the women I am today.

    To beloved tormented hubby; “I love you, hunny..”


  7. […] September 13, 2008 · No Comments Todd wants to know if the practice is healthy in a marriage. […]

  8. September 13, 2008 at 12:01 pm — Reply

    I’m going to have to agree with you here. I find myself doing the same thing sometimes with Brooklynne.

  9. September 14, 2008 at 9:30 pm — Reply

    I think it’s quite humorous actually 🙂
    As long as she gets you back.

  10. September 15, 2008 at 9:36 am — Reply

    Yes, it’s totally normal.
    You’re a dude.

  11. Austin Conscience
    September 15, 2008 at 10:38 am — Reply

    I can’t believe you put this out for all to see — even me. You are challenging me to say you are a bad husband, and you don’t want that, I’m sure. Remember, she wanted a husband, not a brother. Maybe you should be having this conversation with her.

    Love ya

  12. September 15, 2008 at 10:52 am — Reply

    Now really, Todd,

    You know you shouldn’t have tempted me and my inners this way on a Monday…. Is it still a.m. in your zone?

    Any woman you have responding to your taunts of love in the third person is well on the way to embracing her own little set of “inners”, hence – Multiple Personalities Disorder”!!!!

    See what you’ve done to the poor woman?!?!
    Name the committee member of the day. You earned this reward.

    Which blog-a-buddy’s for you?

    JP, Kay, JDW, JB, BF, DSW, CEdQ…..

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Is this healthy?